Sarcasm Central

The Many, Many, Many Things That Bring The Too Funny Chicks Angst

Are you ready for an angst-fest?  Wanna get angst-tastic?  My pals/gals over at Too Funny Chicks agreed to write a guest blog post for me and decided to share with my readers their “angst” and of course…you’re gonna laugh and you’re gonna nod your head because some of this stuff gives you heart palpitations and sweaty palms as well.  Enjoy!  And check them out!

Chick E’s Angst

The first thing I did when preparing to write this Guest Blog for a Blog Site called, “Angst” was Google the word Angst.

Angst means fear or anxiety.

I feel like I knew that but sometimes I make up definitions to words so I wanted to double check, especially since I’m only here as a guest blogger. If it were my own blog, Too Funny Chicks.  I probably wouldn’t have cared as much. I am allowed to be dumb there. But not here.

Anyway, there are seventeen million things in this world that cause me angst. Is that right? Does something cause you angst? “I’m feeling very angsty”. That’s not even a word. But it totally should be. It is now. Use it freely…you’re welcome.

Here’s a sampling:

  • Flying – I don’t feel like I’m going to die or anything, I just hate the way airplanes make me feel. It takes weeks for my ears to return to normal. My ears hate flying the most.
  • Dirty Floors – Not just in my house…all floors. If I’m at your house and I feel like your floors aren’t clean, I will feel angsty.
  • Dirty Toilets – Like the one above times a billion. I clean my toilets at least twice a week.
  • Dirty Anything – I just really enjoy things being clean. Can that just be OK?
  • The cat’s litter box – A litter box is nearly reason enough to never, ever, own a cat. That thing is disgusting.
  • My hair – Not quite straight, not quite curly, my hair is a large source of angst for me.
  • A Kitchen “Low” on Food – I use that term “low” loosely, because I am admittedly a grocery hoarder. If I have two jars of something and have to open one, that item goes on the list. I have to have two backups of everything at all times. I’m even like that with produce. I am a produce hoarder. It’s incredibly wasteful, both of food and money. I know this. I just can’t stop. I am currently seeking a therapist if you have any recommendations.
  • Video Games – This I just don’t get. I get angsty about the things I don’t get. I work with so many people who are somewhat consumed by video games. Someone should tell them that stuff’s not real.
  • Pregnant Women – Ugh. It just reminds me of being pregnant. Talk about angst up the wahzoo. As if life isn’t stressful enough, then you go and throw growing a human on top of it. You’re literally growing a human. So weird.
  • Unpainted Toenails – The last time my toes weren’t painted was probably in the 80s. Unpainted toenails are so gross. Except on boys. Then it’s OK.
  • Shoes – For all sorts of reasons. There are never enough shoes. Just when I think I’m finally reaching a cutoff point, I discover some new style/color/function I NEED to have in my life. Currently it is a pair of Hunter rain boots. Then there’s the whole issue of travelling. What shoes do I bring? What if it snows where I’m going and I don’t have my snow boots? And don’t get me started on any sort of weather hitting my shoes (hence the need for Hunter rain boots). If I am out in a cute pair of leather ballet flats and it starts raining, watch out, because I’m running. I’ll knock your ass over to get my feet somewhere where the rain can’t spot the leather. (I’m getting all angsty just thinking about it).

I could go on, but I won’t. I’ll save some room for my cohort, who will have an equally ridic list of things that make her angsty. We’re not very well adjusted. Or sane. But we’re funny and cute and that’s all that really matters.

Chick A’s Angst

I didn’t read Chick E’s portion of this blog prior to writing my list. I just knew that our “angsts” were probably quite similar and I didn’t want to have her or anyone thinking that I was copying.
Angst might be my new favorite word. Especially Chick E’s version “angsty”…Let’s all start saying that.
Alright, let’s get this Angsty Party Started…
Things that bring me angst:

  • Waking up for anything besides just because I wake up. Schedules bring me angst.
  • When the shower water touches me before I am ready.
  • The fact that I don’t floss.
  • The daily choice between looking cute and being comfortable. I know people say there’s a way to achieve both, but that’s kind of a lie.
  • Dust on surfaces.
  • Fingerprints on glass.
  • Anything not clean. Especially my tub. And toilet. And floors. And surfaces.
  • Getting rid of clothes that I never wear or have holes and stains. Like, maybe I’ll wear it or maybe I’ll figure out how to fix it….someday.
  • When necklaces get tangled together.
  • When my magazine pile up. I never read them. I just like to subscribe to all of them.
  • My DVR being too full, too empty or medium storage capacity. So, basically everything about my DVR brings me angst.
  • Wires of any sort. Holy Moly, I HATE wires. They stress me out so much.
  • The news.
  • People that drive in the left lane going 50.
  • When the peanut butter jar is basically empty, but you can’t recycle it with peanut butter in it, so you have to clean it and that is really hard to clean.
  • Inappropriate Leggins wearing. (They’re leggings, but I like to call them “Leggins”)
  • When people call the Magic Kingdom “Disney World”…Disney World has four parks: Magic Kingdom, Epcot, Disney Studios and Animal Kingdom.
  • Other people’s feet.
  • My feet
  • not becoming a worldwide sensation.

Okay, I’ll stop there, but honestly, I could go on and on. And on…and then like on a lot more.

So, stop by our blog, Too Funny Chicks.  where you’re apt to see an entire article about any one of these 27 Angst Filled topics above. I’m thinking my next one might be all about #9 on my list. Pregnant Women don’t bring me that much angst.

THANKS much to Victoria for allowing us to come and guest blog on her amazing site and letting us bring our unique brand of crazy to her site. And a big thanks to Victoria’s Followers for putting up with us and coming over to Too Funny Chicks and maybe Following us too?

We heart you!
-Chick A

About Victoria Sawyer (283 Articles)
Victoria Sawyer is a blogger, author, graphic designer, social media enthusiast and mental health advocate. Shocking, honest, sarcastic and humorous, Victoria aims to make readers feel tangible emotions and physical sensations through writing that brings you into the mind and body of someone suffering from panic attacks, anxiety and this strange often darkly hilarious thing we call life. She published her novel Angst in 2013, which realistically and often graphically depicts life with mental illness. Along with crazy blogging, Victoria enjoys reading historical novels, playing with her naughty cats, engaging in rants and metaphysical existential meltdowns and using punctuation to excess in everything she writes.

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