Sarcasm Central

World Wide Rant on Earth Day

I wrote this a while back, but since today is Earth Day and I feel like indulging in a nice rant at the world, hey why not post?

Have you ever felt…helpless?  As thought you are one teeny tiny amoeba in a sea of billions?  This might be because, gasp, you are actually one out of billions on this friendly little planet we call earth.  And sometimes when realizing you are one of billions you begin to feel that you have no voice, AT ALL.  You cannot enact world change, you cannot sit the world down and give it a stern talking to like you would a teenager.  For god’s sake, imagine if some alien race abducted ALL of us and put us in a ginormous warehouse on some alien planet.  IMAGINE the crowds!!!  HOLY MOTHER-FU#$ing SHIT!! That’s a goddamned lot of humanity.  A holy SHIT TON.

So…since we have no voice, we do feel that we are helpless.  For example, I often feel helpless about everything I hear regarding global warming.  It sounds so damn dire!  If I really sit down and think about the worse case scenario I get really really depressed and then try to reason with myself by getting more depressed.  I’ll tell myself…

“well, humanity was doomed from the beginning anyway…so…oh well!”


“Shit we’re going to all be obliterated eventually, it’s pretty much a certainty because the sun will eventually burn out and god knows what might happen to the universe.”  


“Well shit, we were bound to kill ourselves somehow, either this or nuclear annihilation.”  

It’s all very depressing and I can bring myself right down.  Add that to the fact that I feel there is almost nothing I can do as an individual and I get pretty sad.  Sad enough to say, “Fuck ’em, there’s nothing I can do, so screw humanity and I’m glad I’ll be dead in about 70 years anyway (if I’m lucky enough to live that long).”

That kind of thinking is a lot of fun.  But seriously, what the hell can I do?  I guess I’ll do what I can by writing a snarky blog post about how pissy I get at the world.  Humanity in general is just too big for it’s damn britches.

Here are some things I want to tell the world:

1. Would someone PLEASE for god’s sake come up with some kind of alternative energy, other than fossil fuels?  SOMEONE?  We can apparently put on these huge productions in Hollywood (think of any show you’ve ever watched and how many man-hours go into that) and yet we cannot solve this?  We cannot throw that many people at it that eventually something sticks? I mean shit, we can come up with iphones and 3-D movies and we can go to goddamned space, but we cannot come up with an alternate fuel source?  Bullshit!  I call Bullshit on SCIENCE!!

2. Secondly, can someone please, please make a decision about global warming.  Supposedly this shit is going down and if yes, WHAT THE HELL ARE WE DOING ABOUT IT?  Oh that’s right, nothing.  We’re doing nothing, just like we’ve done nothing all along.  Bullshit again!

3. I’m directing this to town governments or city governments.  PLEASE for Fuck’s sake, stop building SUPER Wal-marts everywhere.  We don’t need to turn every freaking patch of trees or land into a parking lot.  I don’t need 17 pharmacies or 8 Targets or 99 Burger Kings and Wendy’s and McDonalds etc.  The only reason you are doing this is because you REFUSE to actually plan your city (with like…conservation land etc) because you just want more tax money, which you will probably mismanage.  Get your ACT together!  Stop cutting down habitat for wildlife!  Stop destroying the earth in favor of man-made bullshit that no one needs and places that will sell trash that will immediately end up in some landfill (also, coming to a town near you).

4. Someone, for the love of god,  needs to figure out a way to at least MAINTAIN current populations.  We really really really don’t need more people on this planet.  Resources will run out, particularly if what they say about global warming is true.  Would you rather STOP having kids, or have those kids die early or horribly someday because resources have expired?  I’m thinking…don’t have them in the first place.  Saves on suffering.

5.  We need to stop large corporations from GREED.  Greed is what is pushing this planet into the toilet!  Greed is what causes oil companies to do whatever it takes to make sure they keep seeing profits and we don’t get some other kind of alternative energy.  Greed is what causes people to open super Wal-marts.  Greed is what causes people to buy bullshit they don’t need.

6.  People need to realize that material possessions will not make them happy.  Experiences, friends, human bonding, bonding with nature or animals, these are the things that really matter and will fill that super Wal-Mart sized hole in your chest that you keep trying to fill with plastic bullshit.  Imagine your death bed, will you be sad you didn’t buy one more pair of shoes or one more iphone gadget?  Or will you be thinking about relationships and experiences?  Yup.  Called that one.

7. People need to STOP being so focused on hating each other and limiting each other’s rights.  I cannot believe these are still issues today and that we have to tackle each of these problems INDIVIDUALLY over and over again.  Really world?  Let’s focus on something that is globally important to the SURVIVAL of humanity.  Let’s WORK together to make sure we still have a place to call home.

8. Let’s try to clean up our act regarding pesticides, artificial hormones, GMO’s, toxic waste, fracking, oil spills, nuclear spills, etc.  We are killing the place we call home for what? Oh yeah…mostly it’s for fossil fuels, energy or food.  Human greed and convenience! It’s like we started with this brand new home and now that we’ve been living in it for a very long time, it’s really starting to get dirty.  Who will clean it?  Reminds me of an analogy someone once told me…we’re the fish in the fish bowl and there’s no one to give us clean water, so we’re swimming around in our murky fish bowl.  Clean the WATER!!!  Throw out the baby with the bathwater!!  (what?)

9. Each of us should attempt to think in a more global way rather than a self centered way.  I know it’s hard.  We are each living inside our own heads and it’s hard to realize that there are millions and billions of other people out there just like each of us.  As well as future generations.  For example:  Stop driving gas guzzlers every single day.  Why do you need that huge truck when you NEVER haul anything?

10.  Can we please stop jailing people for shit that isn’t a big deal?  I feel like this is a huge problem in America, particularly.  We will jail someone for just about anything.  It’s a waste or resources, money, etc.

11.  I wish I could say, STOP FIGHTING EACH OTHER!!  And actually have it come true. However, I’m not sure it’s even possible for humanity to stop fighting each other.  It’s like an addiction to us.  We cannot break the habit or rise above it.  But I’m gonna say it anyway…STOP FIGHTING EACH OTHER!!  GAWD!!

12.  Can we please stop causing plant and animal species to go extinct?  Do we really need more wood flooring from the jungles?  Yea clear cutting!  Do we really need to build shit everywhere and cover every square inch of real estate we have?  (Guess what, I guess we do because each individual is making a decision on their own and each person wants to make their little chunk of change and ain’t no one gonna stop the damn individual).  Let’s please remember that we are PART of the earth, not owners of the planet.

13.  How can there really still be people in the world who are hungry?  This gets me.  It seems impossible, but apparently it’s true.  Can we fix this??  Today?  NOW???

14.  No more stupid wasteful products and packaging!  K-cups are all the rage and all the waste.  Every single thing you buy is packaged in plastic.  Why?  Why does a 3-pack of t-shirts need to be packaged in plastic that cannot be recycled?  Are they going to catch a disease if they are not hermetically sealed?? Why can’t they be in paper or NOTHING at all?  Dare to go BARE!!

15.  It’s pretty obnoxious that only rich people can become politicians, senators, President, etc.  When will we finally see an everyman (person), an honest to goodness person who CARES run for office?  I feel like every politician out there is out for his/her own…oh yeah…GREED!!  It doesn’t really seem like these people understand us regular folks.

Here’s the sad truth, if an alien race was studying humanity they would be pretty bummed out with us.  They would see all these little ants going about their daily business, completely unable to work as a group to SAVE themselves.  Basically all the little ants are working toward global destruction and they will not pull their heads out of their asses long enough to see what’s happening.  We are an unthinking, uncaring self-centered swarm that has descended upon an apple.  Pretty soon that apple will turn brown and then be devoured completely.  It’s almost a saddistic comedy to imagine what these alien creatures would see if they watched us from afar.

I could seriously cry for us.  But I think it may be in our nature to destroy ourselves eventually.  It’s sad to think of.  I really really hope that Humanity gets its act together and manages to figure out how to live on this earth.  I’m sorry world, alas, I can criticize you until the cows come home, but I still feel damn helpless about what I can do to make things better. So this is really just a boatload of bitching that I’ve thrown over you like ice cold gatorade.  I’m sorry.

I closing, wouldn’t it be a cruel joke if all those people who thought it didn’t matter what they did while here (huge oil companies, conglomerates, polluters, killers, etc) if after they died (which they were glad to do eventually, because shit…get us the hell out of this sinking ship! (see my evil statement above)) but then in a twist of fate so epic, they came back by being reincarnated and had to live with the consequences of what they had done?  They got to watch the sinking ship go down and the Captain always goes down with the ship, right?

Stay Classy Earth!!

Now that I’ve got that negative depressing rant out of my system and I’m done throwing an enormous hissy fit, I’ll accept that I’m not entirely helpless.  So here are a few sites with ways you can help Mother Earth:

And BTW…support Second Hand Shops!!

101 Ways to Help Planet Earth

50 Ways to Help the Planet

350 Ways to Save the World

How Stuff Works:  10 Things You can Do to Save the Earth

About Victoria Sawyer (283 Articles)
Victoria Sawyer is a blogger, author, graphic designer, social media enthusiast and mental health advocate. Shocking, honest, sarcastic and humorous, Victoria aims to make readers feel tangible emotions and physical sensations through writing that brings you into the mind and body of someone suffering from panic attacks, anxiety and this strange often darkly hilarious thing we call life. She published her novel Angst in 2013, which realistically and often graphically depicts life with mental illness. Along with crazy blogging, Victoria enjoys reading historical novels, playing with her naughty cats, engaging in rants and metaphysical existential meltdowns and using punctuation to excess in everything she writes.

11 Comments on World Wide Rant on Earth Day

  1. So, all of this and more I would agree with. Unfortunately, people are PEOPLE and the masses demand space and MONEY. Everything in the world is driven by small pieces of linen/paper that hold no intrinsic value but we will kill each other for. That and land.

    You should read “Pouring the Cup” (particularly the Covenants the people hold with each other to make life work) because you’ll find everything you want in a society in that book. It’s science fiction, but if everyone began thinking this way and caused a paradigm shift, we could make it happen. One person’s voice may influence others and the spread of a one person’s good thoughts CAN make a difference.


    • Thank you for your thoughtful reply! I’ll definitely check out the book as I love science fiction! It’s true, humanity being human makes it awful hard for us to enact change at a global level. It’s sad that all we care about is ownership of stuff, money, land, etc. I hope we can make a shift! I’ve also read Eckhart Tolle’s A New Earth which discusses how we can change the world by changing our thinking.


  2. Brilliant post – thank you 🙂


  3. I read somewhere that there’s enough food thrown away in Europe and North America every day to stop world hunger. It’s just wrong. And most of these people are starving because their countries are torn by civil war or run by some total nutter who is spending it all on nuclear bombs and huge palaces while his (or her) people starve. Or because they live in places where there are stupid rules like that if there’s not a man to go out and get the shopping the women must stay at home and starve.

    Lorks you’ve got me ranting now! 😉

    Good post.




    • Thanks for joining the rant!! That’s just nuts about how much food is wasted. I know it happens sometimes in my house too and I feel really bad about it. Seems like politics really does play a part, which is ridiculous! It blows my mind that there are still countries out there where people are not free. I wish it wasn’t so!


  4. If I take any amount of time to sit and really think about these things, I will stop getting out of bed. So depressing right?? There needs to be change in so many ways but even the smallest of governments are corrupt so nothing ever gets done. My town won’t pass building a new jr/sr high school even though the current one is full of asbestos, over crowded, and doesn’t pass basic fire & safety codes. Yet they are building a brand spankin’ new housing development with 50 houses right on Rte 108. That’s just what we need…more families without a proper school to send the kids to. The problem is that everyone who gets any amount of power suddenly becomes an a-hole. So all of these politicians who go to work for the greater good, nearly instantly become corrupt for some reason. Why does this happen???

    Ugh, I’m thoroughly pissed off now. I’m going to run for some sort of office. And then take so many bribes and still get nothing done. If things can’t even get accomplished at a town level how are they ever supposed to get done in higher levels?


    • I totally agree with you. If I start obsessing over this stuff I get really pissy too. It sucks! I think you should run for government. I think about it sometimes, but I don’t have that kind of money or the stamina and I can’t be that serious. Plus I can’t really see me being that kind of public figure. I try to tell my husband to run. He refuses as well. Why can’t towns accomplish anything!! Sooo annoying! It’s because humanity might be cool on an individual basis, but get a bunch of us together and we can’t get shit done!!!


3 Trackbacks / Pingbacks

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